So you know how I have been having some SUPER negative posts? Well not anymore all thanks to Zach Bailey. I personally don't know this kid, but my dear friend Janey Lyon does and she showed me this video that he made. Watch it. Understand that you are beautiful just the way you are. Don't change yourself for a world that is always changing. Love yourself before you really loves others.
Don't you hate when you are finally happy and then "whoops!" you hear a bit of news that just RUINS it? Yeahhh.. That just happened to me. Today. So you're having a great day the weekend was spent with a great kid, and then what happens? Oh nothing but lame old High School. Those teenagers some how manage to change things around and spread it all around the school in a matter of minutes. What you think happened suddenly is dramatically changed. You walk around school and people start talking. You have friends that come up to you and tell you that they heard people were talking. Why is it that this always happens? Is it because people are jealous of your happiness? Is it because they don't see how some one so "awful" can be so happy? My theory is this: 1. They want what someone else has. 2. They are insecure with themselves. (the simple answer that your mother told you but it screams the truth.) 3. They are just d-bags. (I could literally say a lot worse things but that is just not me...)
Like I said in my previous blog post, I am simply done with High School. I keep telling myself that I don't care hoping that one day that will actually happen. I won't care about what people think and I will realize that it is only my opinion of myself that matters.
Who would have thought that turning 18 would be this emotional. I cried last night because I couldn't believe that today was actually going to happen. I cried during lunch because my mom wrote me the best note ever. I cried after school because I got to see my favorite seminary teacher since he was transferred to a different school. I cried when I got home because I read the second note my mom gave me, the note my sister gave me, and realized again that I was going to be OFFICIALLY an adult. Like holy crap. So basically all I did was cry today.
It's not that I am getting older, it is just that fact that so much is going to be happening so soon. College and my whole future is a matter of months away, and this birthday just made it so real. Some days I feel ready, but then most days I don't. It has happened way too fast and I am not even close to begin ready. There are still so many more memories I want to make before I go away. So many things I have to do. GAHHH!! As you can tell I am basically freaking out.
But on a good note, today was just a fantastic day. Slept in, saw my favorite person in the whole wide world (who gave me a pretty stellar gift), saw Brother Porter, got pedicures with my mom and Sophie, and had the best pizza for dinner. Such a good day. No moral for this post. Just simply information and venting.